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Digital Friendships



I need to be edited …, originally uploaded by www.gageyoung.com.

So randomly I’ve been dropping people’s names and resources as my friends.
Mainly people that I’ve met once or twice.
I interact over twitter and blogs with them.
With all this tech, relationships have begun to shift.

So my question is this:

What are the requirements to become real friends rather than just digital acquaintances?

How to deal with difficult kids: The Riddler

Ever had a kid that asks way too many questions? So many questions that it is a distraction for the rest of the kids in the large group? Most of us have been to this place and it’s a tough place to be. For this series I want to highlight the conflict, the person, and some strategy to help you out.

The Conflict

  • The questions are good
  • You want kids to continue to ask questions
  • But there are too many questions
  • There is this tug between these three things. You want your kids to ask good questions. You want them to be engaged in the teaching and if they are asking questions then you know they are engaged. But sometimes kids get overzealous and feel like this is there time to ask anything and everything. You have to be able to balance these three thoughts in the Conflict.

    The Person: The Riddler

    This kind of kid comes in two forms but honestly, there are a ton of variations.

  • The kid who has 1,000 questions
  • The kid who has 1,000 stories
  • Now I’m joking obviously and grouping kids together in a specific niche.

    For most of these kids they are starving for attention, especially species number dos. But again the balance of the conflict must remain in your mind at all times.

    The Strategy:

    So how in the world can you keep the balance of maintaining control of the room and also continue to encourage kids to ask questions? How can you figure out the balance to the conflict that the Riddler presents you?

    First there are a few universal principles that you need to know and I will repeat them on every single blog of this topic.

    You control the room

    You are the large group leader. It falls on you to create, manage, and develop a welcoming environment that engages kids with spiritual truth. It is your responsibility to control the environment.

    Relationship is key

    If you don’t know the kid’s name that is asking the questions, well then you probably don’t have enough of a relationship with them to have a tough conversation with them. Build a relationship with the kids and be able to have a conversation because of your relationship with that child.

    Know your timing

    This is where most noobs get in trouble. I absolutely failed at this when I began. When I first started teaching large groups, kids would ask questions and I would take them. But I ran out of time, every time. The lesson wouldn’t get taught because I wasn’t responsible for the time that was given for the large group teaching. Know your timing and know if you have the time to take questions, discpline, and joke around with the kids and still be able to teach the lesson.

    Specific strategies for this kind of difficult kid

    1. Always take the first question-
    2. It helps kids to know that you want to answer their questions. Always try and answer it to the best of your ability. And be honest. I’ve dove into some deeper theology before here and also been able to tell them that there isn’t necessarily a clear answer in scripture, and also said ,that I have no idea. Honesty is always the best policy.

    3. Help to guide the questions to stay on subject-
    4. Questions are so incredibly important for kids and if a kid can ask a question that will help another kid understand the lesson a bit more, what more could you ask for? Help by asking a few guiding questions. Is this question about forgiveness? Is this question about serving God? Is this question about our Bible Story? If not then can we talk about it after our teaching time? Help them to be able to make responsible decisions and be ready to determine for themselves (in time) whether that question is appropriate for right now.

    5. Help them to make sure that they are asking God questions too-
    6. One thing that is constant in my teaching is that I want them to know that interaction with God is tangible. Sometimes I do this to a fault. But I want kids to know that God wants to answer their questions even more than I do.

    7. Tough Conversation-
    8. It might be a time for tough conversations if this begins to be a pattern rather than a particular time. Always be kind but give them responsibility. Please don’t say that it makes Jesus sad that you have questions and interrupt the class. If you do this and I find out I will be praying mean things. Just kidding. Sorta.

    Know that if you lose control it’s ok. Everyone does at some point. But evaluate what happened. Know that the only person that is responsible for the environment in the room is the one leading. Don’t blame the kids, for lack of environmental control. It’s on you.

    Be diligent and work hard.
    Build relationships with the kids.
    Constantly continue to develop and get better.

    How have you dealt with a kid that asks too many questions or has a million stories to tell? Any strategies you would add?

    How to deal with difficult kids when you’re teaching

    So I know you’ve been there. There’s a kid in your large group that most would describe as really energetic. But the people telling the truth would call this kid demonic :) Only kidding of course. But I think that we have all had a kid that is one of these three common difficult kids: The Riddler (asks too many questions), The Joker (distracting the audience), or a last one that we will call Robin (Sunday School answer kid). So the next few posts will be about these three types of kids and how you can begin to deal with them in an effective manner in your Large Group setting.

    Thanks for the pic Nulka

    I love my wife

    She’s awesome. I haven’t written a post about her in awhile. No anniversary or special moment to write about, just thankful that God allows me to experience life with her. She loves me and Jesus more than I could have imagined someone would or could.

    Today I would just like to challenge you to reflect on your family. Take some time to just think about them and write something down that you absolutely love about them.

    For my wife: her smile, her laugh, and her discipline.

    How bout you? Think about your family and give thanks today.

    Faceoff Friday: Are you cheering for Lebron and Miami?

    "Lebron James"

    So now that Miami has assembled their super team, will you be cheering for them? Or will you now have a favorite team to hate.

    For me, I’m going to be rooting against them, every step of the way.

    How can I be more creative?

      

    Just “c o l o r” it !, originally uploaded by ! آحــآسـيس.

    This is meant to be a beginner’s guide to creativity. For peeps, that ask themselves the question, “How can I be more creative?” So it’s quite possible that you creative person might be underwhelmed by this list and for that I apologize, but please contribute in the comments to help everyone be more creative with out thoughts.

    Well it’s one of the things that I pride myself on. I absolutely love the time where there is no box and we are going to create something wonderful. But maybe, you aren’t thinking that. You are thinking this is one of the times that you loathe. I can get that, some of my best friends hate out of the box thinking. But in order for us to understand one another better and maybe you are just looking for some inspiration. Here are a few ways to be more creative.

      1. Take and View Pictures- 

      Flickr is a great place to start. They have an explore feature that allows you to see some of the best photos uploaded. It’s a great feature and it’s where I find most of the photos for jcisonline.com. Even find a blog that has some awesome pictures on it. For instance, Jared Erickson, who is a designer that always has killer pictures of furniture and creative brands like this one, Nathaniel Cooper.

      2. Go Outside-

      I know this may seem weird, but to me, being outside is one of the most creative places I can be. Now don’t plan an activity outside just be outside and take it in. The smells, the colors, the animals, and plant life. Just observe. Nothing better than observing the most creative Creator ;)

      3. Watch Youtube and Vimeo-

      A couple of my favorites are Mysteryguitarman and Nice Type channel on vimeo. Check their stuff out, I’m sure to give you some great ideas.

      4. Pandora- 

      I absolutely love Pandora. Listening to Music is big for most people, but Pandora will tell you about the artist and will also link you to the lyrics of the song. Both have given me loads of creative energy.

      5. Talk to People-

      As much as I love technology and there are so many other ways to use it to be creative, there is no substitute for talking to people. I’m not talking small talk. I’m talking Real Talk. Talk to them about how they met their spouse, how they came up with their kids’ names, or if they have any pets. Get them to tell you stories, not just facts.

    These are just a few ways that I get some creative juices flowing.

    How about you? What do you to get inspired?

    How does God really feel about me?

    Ok Leaders let me know if you’ve ever felt like this. Have you ever felt that God created you to vanquish the evils of this world?

    On my best days I really feel like one of these little guys, pushing the envelope and let God be Him through me to rid this planet of the evils that plague our kids around the globe. God using me to teach kids about his love and mercy and grace (which I have the toughest time learning about myself).

    But those are the best days. 

    Other days I feel as if I’m worthless, useless, disgusting, gross, and not worth the time it takes to remember my name (which is only two letters, by the way). And I wonder:

    How does God really feel about me?

     

    But God doesn’t go through this back and forth like we do. As one of my best friends says,

    You are loved, acceptable, and invaluable to the Creator of this Universe.

    I wonder what we as leaders could accomplish if we really felt like these verses were true about us:

    4 Long before he laid down earth’s foundations, he had us in mind, had settled on us as the focus of his love, to be made whole and holy by his love.5 Long, long ago he decided to adopt us into his family through Jesus Christ. (What pleasure he took in planning this!)6 He wanted us to enter into the celebration of his lavish gift-giving by the hand of his beloved Son.7 Because of the sacrifice of the Messiah, his blood poured out on the altar of the Cross, we’re a free people—free of penalties and punishments chalked up by all our misdeeds. And not just barely free, either. Abundantly free!8 He thought of everything, provided for everything we could possibly need,9 letting us in on the plans he took such delight in making. He set it all out before us in Christ,10 a long-range plan in which everything would be brought together and summed up in him, everything in deepest heaven, everything on planet earth.11 It’s in Christ that we find out who we are and what we are living for. Long before we first heard of Christ and got our hopes up, he had his eye on us, had designs on us for glorious living,12 part of the overall purpose he is working out in everything and everyone.   – Eph. 1:4-12

    Go conquer the world today and know that God loves you, He accepts you, and you are invaluable to Him.

    Conquering Impatience

    My wife and I were talking last night.

    She’s in the middle of a job search.

    We really want a house

    We wish we knew more of the long term outlook on our lives, but we don’t.

    Wish we knew where to focus our time and attention to future learning, but it seems that we have no direction.

    So I ask you in the area of impatience and really desiring to know God’s will for your life. What do you do in the middle? Where do you fit long range planning into the mix of following God’s will?

    Transition

    So I’m transitioning roles at Brookwood. And this is my last place to notify.

    I am transitioning from Elementary Production Director to 5th and 6th Grade Pastor. I will be overseeing a new ministry that we are calling Switch. I’m so excited about being able to be a part of this group of kids and their “interesting” place in the human development spectrum :) I can’t wait to see what God has in store and I’m pumped about what’s He’s going to do through these kids that are a part of Switch.

    I will continue blogging on Family Ministry stuff, but you will probably begin to see a lot more preteen ministry stuff as well.

    Excited to see what God has in store

    My Top Ten most wanted for My Birthday

    Top Ten Diabetes Facts, originally uploaded by wellunwell.

    My birthday is in a few weeks (August 5th to be exact) and I’m going to be 24 years old. It’s a little weird as I see other people grow up that i went to school with and hung out with for most of my life getting married and having babies. I guess I am surrendering to the fact that I am an adult. It’s sort of sad :(

    But in honor of this momentous occasion I wanted to show you my top ten wish list on Amazon.com. Feel free to invest in my life and the lives of those that are in my circle of influence.

    You will see mostly books, mainly because I am a learner (top strength on StrenthFinder 2.0) and that is really what I want. That and I couldn’t find a way to list a house on the Amazon wish list. :)

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